Get Your Free eBook

GET IT NOW! Rory Vaden eBook

Sign up to receive my Daily Discipline blog posts via e-mail and get a copy of my popular e-mini book of quotes FREE.

Get a free Rory Vaden e-book!

A First Step of Solving Almost Every Problem

A First Step of Solving Almost Every Problem

One of the biggest reasons why people struggle with solving problems is because they often overlook this critical first step.

Because no matter what the problem is or what the circumstance, you’re best hope for solving it almost always requires the exact same beginning.

You have to take ownership of the problem.

You have to internalize responsibility for your problem.

You have to resolve that regardless of how the problem came to be, it’s both your duty and your ability to find the solution.

It’s not something that you rely on someone else or something else to solve.

Because until you own your problem you can’t own your solution.

When you encounter a problem that you believe is the result of something outside yourself, then you will never be able to have power over that problem.

It is something that is happening to you of which you are just a bystander and a spectator.

By definition, its outside your control.

But when you own your problem, when you take responsibility for its existence, and when you decide that you’re in charge of fixing it, things start to change.

You stop viewing it as something that is occurring to you and you start viewing it as something you can maneuver.

You stop experiencing it and you start influencing it.

You stop being affected by it and you start affecting it.

Once you own your problem, you create the opportunity to find the solution.

Because if it happened to you through no fault of your own, then you are just an unfortunate victim of circumstances that are beyond your control.

But If you decide that you played some part in creating it, and you own it as your fault, then you can play the lead role in solving it.

And even if you didn’t create the problem. Even if the problem did result from something outside your control. You can still do something about it.

There are always things within your control that you can do. So do those things and never let any problem be an excuse for why you don’t focus on what is in your control.

While you can’t always control whether or not problems show up, you can always control how you respond to them and what you do about them.

One way or another, your life is your fault.

So own the problem.

Then own the solution.

Getting Through Grief with Debbie Lee – Episode 208 of The Action Catalyst Podcast

Debbie Lee is an author, public speaker and CEO of America’s Mighty Warriors who travels the nation telling her son’s amazing story and advocating and supporting our troops, their families and families of the fallen. Debbie understands the sacrifice our troops make and that “Freedom isn’t free.” On Aug 2, 2006 she received a knock on the door that would forever change her life. She was notified that her son Marc Alan Lee had been killed in action becoming the first Navy SEAL killed in Iraq. Since that day Debbie has dedicated her life to honoring our troops and the families of the fallen, defending our defenders and fighting to keep the freedoms that our troops have fought for. She has worked tirelessly to ensure that our troops and military and Gold Star families have access to respite and important services that help assist recovery after injury or loss.

By God’s strength she chose to rise above the most devastating circumstance of her life to impact other’s lives giving them hope and encouragement. In response to her son’s last letter home to “pass on the love, the kindness, the precious gift of human life” she founded America’s Mighty Warriors and is providing programs that improve quality of life, resiliency and recovery.  Debbie has completed a multitude of cross country tours, visited Gitmo, and visited Iraq in 2007 and 2010 becoming the First Gold Star Mom in history to visit the combat zone where her son died. She has conducted over 1000 media interviews and has been a regular on FOX news. Debbie appeared on stage with Tim McGraw at the ACMA’s in 2007, has met with President Bush numerous times and can often be found on Capitol Hill advocating for our troops.

“God has equipped me and given me amazing strength and hope, and I want to share that with others.” ~Debbie Lee

Show Highlights:

How do we move on when bad things happen? @MightyWarriors

I had a choice of how I responded. @MightyWarriors

Read Marc’s last letter home here.

“To all my family and friends, do me a favor and pass on the kindness, the love, the precious gift of human life to each other..” – Marc’s last letter home

Doing random acts of kindness will help you overcome grief. @MightyWarriors

Rory shares two key elements of responding to grief. @rory_vaden

Going through grief is a take the stairs moment. @rory_vaden

In the darkest moments, extend your perspective. @rory_vaden

Our ability to have peace is directly proportionate to the term of our perspective. @rory_vaden

The size of the problem doesn’t change, but the term of your perspective does.  @rory_vaden

Make an intentional choice to take your pain, go out and use it for good. @rory_vaden

Hero’s are those that serve. @rory_vaden

The Action Catalyst is a weekly podcast hosted by Rory Vaden of Southwestern Consulting every Wednesday. The show is regularly in the Top 25 of Business News Podcasts, has listeners from all around the world and shares “insights and inspiration to help you take action.” Each week Rory shares ideas on how to increase your self-discipline and make better use of your time to help you achieve your goals in life. He also interviews special expert guests and thought leaders. Subscribe on iTunes and please leave a rating and review!

The Marshmallow Test – The Payoff of Delayed Gratification

THE PAYOFF OF DELAYED GRATIFICATION

If you’ve never heard of the marshmallow test, it’s worth knowing about.

From Wikipedia:

The Stanford marshmallow experiment was a series of studies on delayed gratification in the late 1960s and early 1970s led by psychologist Walter Mischel, then a professor at Stanford University. In these studies, a child was offered a choice between one small reward (a marshmallow) provided immediately or two small rewards (i.e., a larger later reward) if they waited for a short period, approximately 15 minutes, during which the tester left the room and then returned.

In follow-up studies, years later, the researchers found that those children who were able to wait longer for the preferred rewards tended to have better life outcomes, as measured by SAT scores, educational attainment, body mass index (BMI), and other life measures.

It’s a simple choice in this experiment, “one marshmallow now or two later?”

That is a variation of the same choice that each of us make every single day when it comes to a multitude of decisions in our lives.

Indulge in the thing right in front of us or make a disciplined choice now and receive more blessings later on?

In Take the Stairs we called this dynamic the Paradox Principle of Sacrifice.

Which simply stated is this: Easy short term choices lead to difficult long term consequences.

Meanwhile, difficult short term choices lead to better long term consequences.

That’s the payoff of self-discipline.

And self-control is the brother of self-discipline.

If self-discipline is doing things you know you should be doing even when you don’t feel like doing them.

Then self-control is not doing things you know you shouldn’t be doing.

But both of them have the same result: long term rewards.

Long term gain.

Long term satisfaction.

Long term happiness.

Doing the right thing in the short term is what creates the better life in the long run.

We often think of these things as “sacrifices” but they aren’t sacrifices.

A sacrifice is giving something up that you never get back.

Good decisions aren’t sacrifices at all.

Good decisions are short term down payments on rich future blessings.

Of course, this idea is nothing new.

Hebrews 12:11 said it this way 2000 years ago:

“No discipline seems pleasant at the time. Yet it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.”

Think about that: “a harvest of righteousness and peace…”

Isn’t that what you want?

A harvest of righteousness and peace.

An abundance of blessings, good fortune, and calm faith.

A life filled with joy and free from stress.

Those things are available for your future.

They are available by the choices you make today.

They are available by doing the things now that you know you should be doing even when you don’t feel like doing them.

And by not doing things you know you shouldn’t be doing.

They are available through a little self-discipline and self-control expanded consistently.

In every area of your life, sow today for your harvest tomorrow.

The story of Southwestern Consulting – My Business Partner Dustin Hillis Featured on the EO Fire Podcast

Dustin Hillis  and I met when we were in college through the Southwestern Advantage door to door summer work program.

Dustin broke the all-time sales record in the company’s 160 year history making $100,000 in one summer. The year prior was the year I broke the company’s recruiting and team building production record.

 

This past week I was so honored to see Dustin be interviewed and featured on one of my other good friends, John Lee Dumas’ podcast. The Entrepreneur On Fire Podcast hosted by John Lee Dumas gets millions of downloads every month, has featured some of the most recognized thought leaders in the world, and is widely regarded as one of the best business podcasts in the world.

Click here to listen to Dustin’s interview with John.

The Misconception People Have About Sales

THE MISCONCEPTION PEOPLE HAVE ABOUT SALES

If you think “sales” is a bad word, then you’re thinking about it wrong.

You may think of it poorly because you’ve had a bad experience or maybe even because you’ve had bad information.

“Sales” sometimes gets a bad reputation because even sales-people often misunderstand their role and the value they provide.

Too many salespeople think of selling as “talking people into things.”

But sales is not about talking people into things at all.

Sales should be thought more of as serving people.

In fact, at Southwestern Consulting, we often use the term Servant Selling to help reinforce the core of what true professional salesmanship is all about.

Servant Selling is about helping people make decisions about what is best for them.

Servant Selling is about helping people make their lives better.

Servant Selling isn’t something you do “to” people; it’s something you do “for” people.

People need help understanding options.

People need help coming up with solutions.

People need help finding answers.

People need help overcoming fear.

People need help pushing past procrastination.

People need help making decisions.

And those are all things that a highly trained, well coached, professional salesperson will help them with!

Professional sales people help people make better decisions.

And that is an extremely valuable service.

When someone has a negative connotation around “Sales” it’s because they typically understand it as adversarial.

As in, it’s the salesperson vs the prospect. And it’s a battle and a fight to the finish about who is going to win…

Will the prospect be able to hold out or will the salesperson have the magic words to convince someone and pressure them to buy something they don’t really want?!

Yuck.

That’s not selling.

Servant Selling isn’t adversarial at all.

Servant Selling is never about the salesperson winning and the prospect losing; its always about the prospect winning.

Because Servant Selling isn’t about the salesperson vs the prospect; it’s about the prospect vs some challenge, opportunity, or problem the prospect is trying to overcome in their life.

In that way, Servant Selling is the salesperson and the prospect together, on the same team, working side by side to try and find a solution to make the prospect’s life better.

The salesperson is serving the prospect.

The salesperson is supporting the prospect.

The salesperson is helping the prospect.

And sales doesn’t happen through one way communication; it happens through a conversation.

It happens through a dialogue.

It happens through the salesperson asking questions, listening, and understanding the prospect’s situation first.

And then offering solutions to help them make their life better.

So if you want a more accurate way to think of professional salesmanship…

Think of it as a conversation about someone’s needs, where we ask them questions and understand their situation.

Then, we enthusiastically show them options that will hopefully solve those problems, and then we gracefully lead them through a decision process that helps them make a choice that’s best for them.

Sometimes they buy and that’s great! Sometimes they don’t, and that’s okay too.

The role of an expert sales professional is to just help them make a decision about what’s best for them.

Think of it as a partnership.

Think of it as helping.

Think of it as serving.

Why Your Organization Isn’t Growing and 5 Behaviors to Groom Future Leaders

Why Your Organization Isn't Growing and 5 Behaviors to Groom Future Leaders

A leader’s job is not to create followers.

A leader’s job is to create other leaders.

And it’s a frustrating place when an organization is stuck, stagnant, and not growing.

But often time a core cause of that is because the leader isn’t engaging in practices that develop other leaders.

How do you do that?

Here’s 5 simple ideas:

1.Teach Problem Solving – If you answer every question your team asks you then you aren’t creating leaders because you aren’t creating critical thinkers. Instead, you’re creating dependents.

One of the practices at Southwestern when building organizations is that the next time an experienced team member brings you a question or a problem ask them “What are your options? What’s your best option? What do you think we should do? Go with that.”

After you do that enough times they’ll start figuring it out on their own.

2. Delegate – Delegating is not just about helping you be more productive and saving you time. Delegating is also about giving other people a chance to step in and learn and practice critical skills that they will need in order to take the next step.

We are often afraid to delegate because we think “they won’t be able to do it as well as I can.” But as Spencer Hays once said, “You don’t build company if you build people, and those people build companies”

Give someone a chance to help. Give them a chance to step up. Throw them in the deep end and see if they can swim. It’s one of the best litmus tests of all for determining who your real leaders are. Work side-by-side with them through the whole process.

Plus, very often you’ll be surprised that people often rise to the level of leadership you allow to be available to them.

3. Teach Leadership – If you want to develop leaders you have to spend time teaching them the principles of leadership!

You have to teach them the art of dealing with people. You have to teach them how to recruit, interview, hire, train, motivate and work through other people.

The best way to do this is to mentor, by having people with you and watching you and helping as you lead processes and lead people.

If you or someone you know needs leadership training and they are in sales leadership or sales management then you should request a free call to talk with one of our sales leadership coaches. If you are not in sales leadership and just need general leadership knowledge then you should consider joining this virtual training.

4. Help them build a Vision – The amount of our endurance and the intensity of our self-discipline is directly proportionate to the clarity of our vision. When we have a crystal clear picture of what we want in business and life then there is a naturally strong connection to the sacrifices we are asking ourselves to make today that forward us towards a future that we care about. Every business endeavor needs to start with a 5 or 10 year vision with year-by-year numbers and metrics, broken down by month or week in the first year.

So your job as the leader is to help make sure that you make the time to map out a detailed month by month vision of what will take them to the level of achieving their goals and becoming a future leader.

But it’s not enough to just help them create a vision; you have to also then hold them accountable to hitting the regular metrics and check points that are required to stay on track with that vision. Vision and accountability are two sides of the same coin and in order for a leader to develop other leaders you must be skilled at providing both to you team.

5. Spend time with them 1 on 1 – One of my favorite Dustin Hillis quotes is that often when it comes to things like leadership, “One on one time in the field with your people is the key to successful leadership and transference of knowledge.”

While it is important to teach the practical skills, and to get the formal education on leadership, nothing can be a substitute for spending one-on-one time with the people in your organization that you identified as potential future leaders. Mentoring them and discussing with them their daily challenges, big picture ideas, and long-term visions will always be a great way for them to learn.

Most of all, invite them into issues and struggles that you are dealing with so that they can see you in action. They will learn an extraordinary amount just from watching the way that you handle situations. Remember, “tell me and I forget. Show me and I remember. Involve me and I understand.”

These of course are not the only five behaviors that must be taken to develop leaders, but they are five great ones that are immediately actionable to help you get on the right track.

The journey to develop other leaders beyond yourself begins largely as a matter of intention and a decision to do so.

As you make that decision and do these five behaviors, your leadership philosophy will spread and your leadership influence will multiply.